Hello from 7th St. and Ocean Drive, South Beach
A woman with breast implants, wearing nothing but a sheer summer dress, somehow out of her mind with arms pretzeled up like she had a neurological disorder, was being escorted along the boardwalk by two men, one steroid-muscled. A coconut salesman said, “I tried to give her a coconut but she wouldn’t take it.” Her eyes weren’t crossed but also weren’t looking at...
leoncrawl: Off to Ft Greene Park now, gonna throw some savage d’s on it. Throw some on the pickup soccer league for me.
Scottie Thompson on IMDB OMFG/WTF/FTW →
I was just eating Peruvian pescado a lo macho here in Miami Beach when an episode of NCIS came on and *surprise!* my former study-abroad pal Scottie was playing a doctor on television. A shifty guy didn’t want an autopsy and she was like “Shut up I’m doing one.” And whoa she plays Diane in Porn Star, and is in the Star Trek movie. What in the heck! Good job, Scottie.
Policeman vs. Firefighter: Now more than a boyhood... →
fiatluxemburg: James Brewer suffered a stroke and, thinking he was dying, confessed to a murder he had committed thirty years earlier in his hospital bed. Like the majority of people who suffer stroke, he recovered and has now been charged with murder. [#] Either that last sentence is missing a comma or I am unaware of a pretty disturbing trend.
I just had a nightmare so I’m going to twitter some stuff I wish I was doing or could be doing in the near future. Drive south out of Washington, DC to North Carolina. Any kind of car would be okay, but an old Mustang would be the glaze on the donut. Sit at a $1 - $2 no-limit table, at a casino anywhere in the country or at a house game on the Eastern Seaboard (in the Milwaukee...
Now I just want to have gay sex and multiply. →
good jokes bad jokes it’s all the same to me
Take a chance and learn to fly there, Orville Wright.
I think we didn’t do anything but watch sports bloopers while we got...– Doug Stanhope
Sarah: what's poppin
me: just about to head out the do'
i got a job, you know!
Sarah: yeah yeah, i've heard that one before
1) A young, bespectacled man trained his point an shoot at the unoccupied building next door. I have reason to believe the completed construction of the building is the reason my landlord notified Leon of an increase in our rent. 2) My version of Paintbrush, the free program for Mac that resembles Paint, is full of bugs, so much so that it will not even respond to a Force Quit command. If anyone...
thegaragekeepersaid: […] My most recent find, that “the Swamp Sparrow has the ability to emit songs that are physically difficult to produce during hostile situations, implying that songbirds use sophisticated vocal performances as signals in aggressive communication” is eerily linked to my joyride mentality to riding in cars with parents. What kid likes that activity? Apparently my power...
This reminds me of Lux. →
Before their displacement from nature, baffled by the grandeur of their own...– Gaddis. The Recognitions. 65.
Ben: he cracked up when i told him you kissed him on the lips
he couldnt stop talking about what an awesome move that was
and i know why he targeted you
because you beat him at bond
i didn't even remember doing that
Ben: playing bond?
yeah... he was telling me last night that he stopped remembering things at playing bond
Ben: and started remembering when he woke up with a piece of pizza in jenny's bed at her palce
what a character
Ben: his friend who was visiting was locked out of danny's place all night
me: hey here's a question
how do you feel about shaving my neck this weekend
that's quite a responsibility
im going to dc on saturday morning
me: ah fuck
i dont see why not
“It’s basically like years of therapy in two or... →
I find this hard to believe. Therapy doesn’t make your hangovers worse — or maybe it does. (via hartman)
J-Treds feat. Hi-Tek. "Weak Minds." →
This is from the Napster era. Rawkus records was a source of undergraduate bonding. Most of those friendships have wilted; gangster rap came back. Still, the piano hook here is great, like the soundtrack from “New York Undercover,” or something RZA would do. Also, I do like that “vegetables” and “collectables” rhyme. I’m having trouble immediately finding...
In 1929, a suicide attempt at the Allerton Hotel by music teacher Helen Whiley was thwarted by a local policeman. She had been spotted ready to jump off the roof. Alerted to the emergency, the officer raced to the scene and brought her to safety. This was fortunate for Ms. Whiley at the time, just as it is for guests at Hotel 57 today; the building is not, to our knowledge, haunted.